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Who's General Failure & why's he reading my disk?
Windows: Just another pane in the glass.
Error reading FAT record: Try the SKINNY one? (Y/N)
Computer Song To be sung with the theme from the Beverly Hillbillys:
Come and listen to a story 'bout a man named Ted, A poor college kid, barely kept his family fed. But then one day he was talking to a recruiter who said, "they'll pay big bucks if ya work on a computer".. UNIX, that is....Windows XP....Workstations...C++...VB Well, the first thing ya know ol' Ted's an engineer. The kinfolk said "Ted, move away from here". They said "Arizona is the place you oughta be" so he bought some donuts and he moved to Ahwatukee... Intel, that is....dry heat... no amusement parks..... On his first day at work, they stuck him in a cube. Fed him lots of donuts and sat him at a tube. They said "your project's late, but we know just what to do Instead of 40 hours, we'll work you 52!" OT, that is ...unpaid...mandatory..... The weeks rolled by and things were looking bad. Schedules started slipping and some managers were mad. They called another meeting and decided on a fix. the answer's very simple..."we'll work him sixty-six!" Tired, that is.. stressed out.. no social life.... Months turned into years and his hair was turning gray. Ted worked very hard while his life just slipped away Waiting to retire when he turned 64, instead he got a call and escorted out the door. Laid off, that is...de-briefed...unemployed. Now the moral of the story is, do what you are told companies will use you and discard you when you're old So gather up your friends and start your own firm, Beat the competition, watch old bosses squirm. Millionaires that is.....Bill Gates...Steve Jobs... Ya'll come back now, ya hear. There! Now get back to work!
I halve a spelling checker, It came with my pea see. It plainly marks four my revue Mistakes I dew knot sea. Eye strike a key and type a word And weight four it two say Weather eye am wrong oar write It shows me strait aweigh. As soon as a mist ache is maid It nose bee fore two long And eye can put the era rite Its rarely ever wrong. I've scent this massage threw it, And I'm shore your pleased too no Its letter prefect in every weigh; My checker tolled me sew.
Young Susie was having trouble with her computer so she called Wes, the computer guy, over to her desk. Wes clicked a couple buttons and solved the problem.
As he was walking away Susie called after him, "So, what was wrong?" And he replied, "It was an 'ID ten T' error." A puzzled expression ran riot over Susie's face. " 'An ID ten T' error? What's that, in case I need to fix it again?" He gave her a grin. "Haven't you ever seen an 'ID ten T' error before?" Susie replied, "No." "Write it down," he said, "and I think you'll figure it out."
. . . . . . . . . . I D 1 0 T
Tech Support: "I need you to right-click on the Desktop."
Customer: "Ok."
Tech Support: "Did you get a pop-up menu?"
Customer: "No."
Tech Support: "Ok. Right click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?"
Customer: "No."
Tech Support: "Ok, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until this point?"
Customer: "Sure, you told me to write 'click' and I wrote click'."
There are three engineers in a car; an electrical engineer, a chemical engineer, and a Microsoft Software Engineer.
Suddenly the car just stops by the side of the road, and the three engineers look at each other wondering what could be wrong.
The electrical engineer suggests stripping down the electronics of the car and trying to trace where a fault might have occurred.
The chemical engineer, not knowing much about cars, suggests that maybe the fuel is becoming emulsified and getting blocked somewhere.
Then the Microsoft engineer, not knowing much about anything, comes up with a suggestion. "Why don't we close all the windows, get out, get back in, open the windows again, and maybe it'll work!?"
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